diamondsky's Diaryland Diary

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Tiffany's

Holly Golightly: You know those days when you get the mean reds?
Paul Varjak: The mean reds, you mean like the blues?
Holly Golightly: No. The blues are because you're getting fat and maybe it's been raining too long, you're just sad that's all. The mean reds are horrible. Suddenly you're afraid and you don't know what you're afraid of. Do you ever get that feeling?
Paul Varjak: Sure.
Holly Golightly: Well, when I get it the only thing that does any good is to jump in a cab and go to Tiffany's. Calms me down right away. The quietness and the proud look of it; nothing very bad could happen to you there. If I could find a real-life place that'd make me feel like Tiffany's, then - then I'd buy some furniture and give the cat a name!

I wish I could find a place like that, too. I wish I could stop being afraid. I wish I could embrace the life that God has given me.

Jon asked me last night, "Why do we have to focus on our faults?" I've been trying to find a reasonable answer for this all night, but I just can't. It doesn't make sense to focus on our faults, but sometimes my faults are so big and so dumb that I can't see the goodness that is me.

I am mush. I am muddled.

11:09 p.m. - June 18, 2007

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