diamondsky's Diaryland Diary ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Praying in the chapel late at night can do good things for your soul. Brace yourself. It might seem as though my heart is never satisfied. I jump from one crush to another, but I wouldn't say that I put my entire heart into them. I'm holding out, I'm waiting for something. But part of me feels like that little kid Christmas Eve, trying to figure out what's inside that package. I talked with my new friend Mark for about an hour about this. He talked to me about the girl he likes, and I spilled out all this stuff about boys and how I'm confused and all. I told him how I thought I've liked Will, but how I'm frustrated because nothing is happening. How I adore Will's wisdom and faith, but his humor and attitude can be cutting and harsh. I told him how there was a boy who had been progressively nice to me, and suddenly the two of us have started talking more. Mark told me that it's okay for me to have all these crushes, because it helps me find what I'm looking for in the future--for a husband, for life. He just didn't want them to dominate my thoughts, because by loving God I can find love in others. Things will work out, and it'll be better than anything I could have planned, because God has good things in store for us. After we talked, I went down to the chapel to pray. I prayed and I prayed. And then I listened. And I'm pretty sure I heard God say, "Calm down." I told Him thank you, asked for patience, and said good-night. There was one other person in the chapel, but I didn't see who it was. I went back to the doors, to see the pretty night sky and soak up some fresh air. I heard someone say, "Psst." And it was the boy I've been thinking about. He gave me a big hug, asked how I was. We talked about our plans for the evening (he was on his way to his friend's apartment, I was just going to chill in my room). He looked at me with his soft brown eyes and asked if I was okay. I said yes. And he hugged me again, longer this time, then he said goodnight. Was this a sign? I don't know. What it good timing? Maybe. Was God in it? Yes. 11:58 p.m. - October 07, 2006 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- |
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