diamondsky's Diaryland Diary ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Happier Sometimes I feel like I'm living out the line from Guster's "Happier." You've wasted every moment of your Saturdays and your Sundays I feel like sometimes I'm such a boring kid. I don't feel like I make the funny comments that everyone laughs about and remembers the next day. I don't come up with the random ideas (or at least not the ones that people appreciate here at U of I). Sometimes I still feel like I just haven't found a person that I can mesh with. It's frustrating and exhausting. I want to be myself around people--completely, fully, truly myself. It's not exactly that I'm guarding my emotions or holding myself back. It just feels like no one would appreciate my jokes or fun ideas like they would at home. "The Hunt for the Corn Monkey" definitely wouldn't fly over here. Mom came down for the afternoon. She helped me finish up some laundry, and then we spent the afternoon shopping. We found some amazing brown Sketchers shoes at Kohl's, but they didn't have my size! Accck, I hate when that happens. We definitely had some fun wandering around Target. I can't wait to move into our apartment and decorate every room! Whee! Tonight wasn't what I expected, either. We had the Random Adventure Crew. And a LOT of people showed up. We went to Culver's, and I ordered a chocolate shake and french fries. I dunked my fries in the shake, just like I would with Kim back in high school. And everyone shuddered in disgust. It kinda bummed me out, but whatever. We moved on to Wal-Mart and did all sorts of silly stuff. I found some really good schtuff in there. We finished the night by returning to Newman. The group of us was going to Apples to Apples with me, but a big chunk of the group left as they decided they were tired (at 9:30pm). The five us of that stayed had a really good, giggly time. I laughed loud and hard. Water was shot up my nose. My friend Dan put down "Emily Dickinson" for the word "Lucious." I laughed until my face was red and my stomache ached. I was laughing just to laugh. It was amazing. I just wish I had more evenings like this. Evenings that I can tell to my kids. Or at least a story to share with a new boyfriend or something. Ugh. I think I'm going to send myself a big boquet of tulips for St. Valentine's Day. That's all. I'm exhausted. 12:28 a.m. - January 28, 2007 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- |
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